Where The Smoke Is Coming From....

It's hard to forget.

It's hard to forget those feelings that beat too true to go away with just a passing of time.
It is beautiful how nobody understands me....

Beautiful like an out of control fire... the lights and colors are beauty to the eyes, but it burns,
and destroys whatever is in its path.

Every single day it seems that much easier to blame myself. Blame myself for the disdain
I feel I receive. I plague my mind with thoughts of far-fetched stupidity, because I know nothing
of treatment that is other that what I've received.

A smile seems like I have to work for it. A question of concern, is something that I feel I only receive on my
birthday.
I don't understand my loneliness, nor do I feel I should.
Nor do I understand why fatal wounds were inflicted upon my heart, as it burst out of my chest
into your waiting hands.
I never understood what it is about me that carries such ill-will towards me.

"I love you"

I don't even want to talk about it now.... It's coming to the point that I don't want to write about it.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know what to feel.
I don't know why I caused you to hate me.

Break-down.... I don't even care that I care this much. Enough to bring a person down.

This is how much you make my heart feel....

Now I can't even get someone to take what you damaged....